The Sun Shines Out Of Our Behinds

I know a place where we can go,
Where we are not known.
- The Smiths

Speeding home in an FX last night, I found myself cheered by the prospect of kicking open the door to our flat, dropping my things to the floor, and collapsing lifeless on the bed. With my tongue hanging out. With buzzards circling me overhead. I'd been feeling pretty much like a zombie the whole day, anyway; I spent 8 hours in a cubicle with a string of dancing beds orbiting my head, went about my work with the enthusiasm of a block of wood, and crawled out of the office when 6 o'clock came around.

Except that when the FX finally spat me out onto Katipunan Avenue, I realized that I didn't have my house keys with me. I'd misplaced them a couple of days ago and couldn't seem to find the damn things at all.




Oh, screw it, I thought. I could stay awake for a little longer, why not! I could send my sister a message and just ask her when she was coming home. Ah, technology. I could just sit on the stairwell and play dead while waiting for her!

Except that when I fished around my bag, I remembered that I forgot my phone at home, which meant that I had no way of contacting my sister, which meant that playing dead on the stairwell was out of the question. And who knew when she was coming home? 10, maybe? Midnight? Peachy, you are such a clever little bastard. What a great time to forget your keys and your phone! Well done, well done.

When it comes down to it, I’m certainly the sort of person whom Post-It notes were designed for. The only trouble with Post-It notes is that once I’ve bought a tablet of them and used a quarter of the notes, they’re as easily forgotten, and could sit unused on my desk for at least a year.

I recall having bought planners in the past, filling in the days faithfully for the first two months, and then discarding the entire effort altogether towards April. In other words: I start out every year with all of my plans as harmoniously pieced together as the Brady Bunch. By June, the same plans have all been shot to hell, and what I have instead of the Brady Bunch is a family where the Mom smokes crack, the Dad’s a tranny, and the kids all have mutant penises on their foreheads.

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Are you safe and well? Tell me that you are, mister.


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I can’t wait I can’t wait I can’t wait!!! I hope it rains during our climb tomorrow. Oh my fucking god. I’m not even sure if I can get any sleep tonight, I’ll probably be chewing on my nails until my alarm goes off and it’s time to skip away to the assembly venue.

Here’s the Climb Itinerary:

Training Climb 1
14-15 July 2007
Mt. Cinco Picos, Zambales

Day 1: Saturday, 14 July 2007
03:00 Assembly at Ayala Tower One
04:00 ETD for Bgy. Cawag, San Marcelino, Zambales
07:30 ETA at Bgy. Cawag; Breakfast
08:00 Start of trek
08:30 Community service/outreach at Mang Lando
09:00 River crossing
11:30 First rest stop – Nipa Hut
12:00 Resume trek
12:30 Lunch at Bulldozer Area
13:30 Resume trek
15:00 Hidden Spring
15:30 Last Nipa Hut; last water source
16:00 Ridge Summit
17:00 Campsite
19:00 Dinner
20:00 Team socials/group presentation
22:00 Lights out

Day 2: Sunday, 15 July 2007
05:00 Wake-up call; breakfast; break camp
07:00 Start of trek
08:00 Ridge summit
09:00 First Nipa Hut
11:00 Bulldozer rest stop; lunch
12:00 Resume trek
13:00 Last Nipa Hut
14:00 ETA at Mang Lando
14:30 ETD to resort (wash-up area)
15:00 ETA at resort; wash-up; early dinner
18:00 ETD to Manila
21:30 ETA at Ayala Tower 1

Until the next installment, ladies and gentlemen.
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